Watch yer back, son - Christ, lad, watch out! Panic stations from the guy in the wheelchair as gravity does its thing. Mind the slope, mumbles the bartender beneath her breath, as though saying the rosary. Biercafé-cum-Micropub with a side of pure vertical danger. 20% gradient entry passageways aren’t for the faint of heart, or the inebriated of foot. Side room chock full of bottle conditioned real ale, enough to bring the trendy canned craft brigade out in hives. Glass is king round these parts. Fear not, youth of today, there’s a keg list. An odd sounding pastry sour, some hazy gear, and a serviceable local pilsner. Something for everyone to sip on and watch the sun dip behind the cathedral from the terrace. Just don’t forget to test your brakes.
3at3 Real Ale & Beer Café, 3 Three Cups Walk, Ely CB7 4AN
Will there be Micropubs called the Software Engineer’s Son in the future? The Draymen of yesteryear surely couldn’t have predicted their misty-eyed immortality. But here we are. With a jaunty paint job, too. There’s a special place in Pub Valhalla for landlords offering fridges teeming with 50cl brown bottles of German beer. Tegernsee, Augustiner, Schneider, even some Schlenkerla for anyone keen to retire their palate for the evening. Pure tonic for travellers weary from a day on the real ale and hazy stuff. Once initial lager fervour fades, it becomes evident we’re in a brewery taproom. Three Blind Mice - nope, hadn’t heard of them, either. They do a Best Bitter that would fit into the handpull selection of any CAMRA award winning pub, though. Certainly would’ve had a second pint of it, had the bottle of Rochefort 10 in the fridge not caused distraction. Long live the European Beer Fridge.
Drayman’s Son, 29a Fore Hill, Ely CB7 4AA
There’s a strong correlation between the calibre of a pub’s carpet and the quality of the real ale it serves. Now, by “calibre”, we’re talking less Good Housekeeping, more Wetherspoon’s meets your gran’s house. This sweet spot is evidently achieved as soon as the heavy oak door swings open. Pub Carpet Nirvana. Half of Cambridgeshire’s dog population is here to snooze, roll, and loll all over it. Nine handpumps rise from the bar to meet you, dispelling inevitable worries sparked by “Greene King” plastered all over the outside walls on your way in. One line of insipid Abbot Ale on the turn? Or an array of milds, stouts, ESBs, best bitters, and pales kept with care and love? The PubCo tied-house lottery. If you don’t buy a ticket, you’re never going to win.
The Prince Albert, 62 Silver St, Ely CB7 4JF
Pub Vignettes is a monthly(ish) collection of impressions of the world’s more interesting drinking spots.
For those who’ve followed along for more than a decade via the now-retired Beermack site, welcome back. For those newer to this parish, welcome.